November 29, 2008

You Can Call Me Al

Since it was Thanksgiving week, we've decided to postpone our usual Sunday dish&bitch and do an special Holiday edition beerunch.

We invited special holiday guest Jeff to Nodding Head for some booze, bitching and some wishful 3 am barfing.

Location: Nodding Head, 1516 Sansom St.
Attendees: Rob, Ryan, Bethany, Natasha, Yasmine, Brent and surprise attendee Bryon.

Missing: A couple of tequila shots.

Special Guest: Jeff aka Facetits
Occupation: Cunning Linguist/Sketch Artist
Favorite Finger: The Pointer

Before we start I have to be quite honest, I didn't write down as much as I should have. I was planning on doing this entry freestyle. Oh and half way through Jeff's interview, I noticed that a few American Apparel employees sitting behind of us, how intriguing.

We started the night off with a fun ass activity of hand turkey.
We're all about giving our special guest hand jobs.

From the looks of it, it appears that he drew this when he was blacked out drunk.
The cruel reality was that he was 94% sober at the time. It is very Picasso-esque (If Picasso had a case of the Parkinson's).

After he finished his drawing, we ordered beer. It was a beerunch after all.

Drink list:
Rob & Ryan: WFC Ale that had a 7% alcohol thing or shit.

It's a beer for seamen. Ha, semen.

Yasmine & Bethany:
Some kind of burrrr

All-Night Ale with Espresso, but when I found out it was only 3% Alcohol, I switched to Grog.
Before I switched to Grog, everyone at the table beerlested my All-Night Ale.


Yasmine got the crab cake. I/We were very surprised that Rob didn't get it as well.

Ryan got the dragon burger. From the looks of it, dragon means all bun.

Bethany ordered the poppers.
haha, she would.

Grandma & Grandpa shared the mussels and spanish fries.

It was so good, Grandma & Grandpa gave us a thumbs up.

I ordered the wings because I can.

After we all ordered it was time for another Holiday game. This time it was MASH.

To make a long story short, Jeff gets to fuck Rosie O'Donnell on a daily basis.
Lucky guy...Because he's taking one for team mankind he gets to live in a mansion with his Pi number of glow in the dark children.

A quick run down of Jeff facts we gathered from the questions we've asked him during his interview:

1. Jeff wasn't born in a barn.
2. Jeff enjoys tracing his hand.
3. Jeff treats sex like he is going to die the next day. ladies, email us if you want his number
4. Jeff would fuck Clay Aiken over Richard Simmons.
5. Jeff's thunderous orgasms is the cause of all the dead dolphins.
6. Jeff would marry Mr.Ed.
7.Jeff's superpower would be multitasking.

If you'd like to read more or see the the x-rated/nc 17 version, email us

written by: Brent
next week: Maggie via National Mechanics

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